I’m Back!

Hi everyone! I know it’s been a while, but there’s been a lot going on with me lately and I haven’t had time to post at all. But I’m going to start making time, because this is more important to me than leaning what electrons do when atoms get stuck together and what shenanigans Messalina has been up to in my Latin text.

I feel slightly ashamed that I haven’t posted in so long that it has begun to snow on my blog and I haven’t even noticed… but there we go, I’m here now. I think I’ll tell you a story about my day yesterday.

I have had a million tests and exams lately, and yesterday was an unseen poetry exam in my English class. English is my thing; it’s what I’m really good at and the one lesson where I feel quite relaxed. However, in the words of my loving English teacher, I “massively cocked it up”. Which is fair enough.

The poem we had to analyse was written by Elaine Feinstein and it was a loving eulogy to her late father who had looked after her well throughout her whole childhood.

The essay that I wrote declared the man in the poem to be an alcoholic who was murdered with a hammer and had it coming. To my dismay, I asked my English teacher at the end of the exam if my ideas were correct and… they were not.

Never mind.

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The School Trip (I had to do sailing and raft building – enough said)

Well, that was an enjoyable day of ‘team building’. Funnily enough, being pushed into a large man-made lake with spiders everywhere for the soul purpose of trying to retrieve a rubber duck, floating on a ‘raft’ a group constructed out of barrels and rope isn’t the best fun. I ended up stood at the side because there wasn’t any¬†room left on the raft! Oh well. I guess it was quite fun, although sailing might have been slightly more enjoyable had our boat not started to sink due to a hole in the bottom. But then I always enjoy a challenge. And being sat in a foot of water in the middle of a lake clutching onto a centreboard for dear life most certainly counts as a challenge!

The Latin Situation

I take Latin as one of my subjects (no, that doesn’t make me particularly intelligent, just because I took it doesn’t mean I can do it) and as a rule I work with the girl next to me, who I am allowed to insult because we are friends. Honestly, it’s fine.¬†Anyway, we tend to translate a lot of things incorrectly, causing my teacher much amusement, but I shall tell you of my favourite times.

Because the text-book is set in Ancient Roman times, there are a lot of references to the Emperor and craftsmen etc. which we tend to get confused by, especially when it comes to the many, many God’s that they had. It is a seemingly endless list. But we also manage to get mixed up with some simple words, for example one time, instead of writing “the skilled craftsmen”, I translated it to mean “the dead craftsman”. It wasn’t particularly out of place, the chapter beforehand there had been some huge massacre and half the town was wiped out, but still. In context, it looked even worse.

The second time was probably my favourite. This was down to both a word order, person ending and general vocabulary problem.

What the actual translation was (sort of, I forget what it was): The King was led up to the alter.

What we managed to get: The Kingdom was led into the changing rooms.

How?

And finally, time number three, which happened but a day ago. For this one, you will need to know that a ‘litter’ is a type of carriage, the one where important people are lifted up by a bunch of peasants way back when.

What the sentence was supposed to say: People were also carried in litters through the market place.

What we thought: People were also picking up litter.

I hope you now see exactly how hopeless I am in this lesson. I did rather wonder about the logistics of getting an entire kingdom in a changing room, but their ‘baths’ was just a blooming great swimming pool so who knows what else they got up to?

The Dentist – Incident Number 2

So I recently returned from the hell that is the dentist where I was told that drinking less tea would be a good idea – does this woman realises she is in England? Like seriously, most people will be drinking a lot of tea! Anyway, I’ve done a post about the dentist before but it is a recurring event so there will most likely be more as well – all tiresome events are enjoyable to inflict upon the internet! Anyway, it’s better than the last time I went – I tripped over the wire of my headphones and stumbled into the room head-first, and when I managed to sit down in the chair and it started to go back, it either had been a long time since I was there or they genuinely go back further nowadays, because I suddenly felt the need to cling on to the arms of the chair and squeal, causing the dentist to say ‘oh, and we’re up the octave’ nonchalantly – I think he has to put up with a lot of idiots like me. Anyway, anyone have any more embarrassing dentist stories? Comment!

That Awkward Moment when you DELETE EVERYTHING

Since about thirty million people use the phrase “that awkward moment” every second for things that really aren’t awkward, like “Oh, that awkward moment when you walk” or something irrelevant such as that, I thought I would give in and use it myself. This was not so much an “awkward moment”, however, as it was a “I want to simultaneously smash my computer screen and comfort-eat Nutella from the jar” moment, because in one simple click I had managed to delete EVERY ONE OF THE 353 SONGS FROM MY I-POD. AH! It was actually painful to watch it slowly delete while I sat there, helpless, frantically clicking buttons in a vain attempt to stop it. Then I drank tea because I’m British and it’s what we do when things go wrong. I don’t know why.