To Introduce The Glossary…
Since, statistically speaking, not everyone who will look at my blog will understand my ‘lingo’ (like, there are more American people than there are English, that’s just a fact), I have decided to do a glossary of all the terms I use that may either be misunderstood or those times you just have absolutely no idea what I am talking about. I learned most of these words and phrases from my family so all I can say is I really don’t blame you. I’ll keep adding to it and tell me in the comments of this page if you want a word defined (or if you had to Google it and are now even more confused than when you first read it).
5SOS: 5 Seconds Of Summer. A really good band.
Ada Lovelace: The WOMAN who made the first ever computer programme. Hear that? A WOMAN.
Awesome Facts: A series of posts I do where I write a bunch of facts about animals or something. I’m running out of animals now I may have to do something boring like cacti.
Bacteria: Some of these are good for you, some kill you, some make you feel awful. The more confusing of the micro-organism world.
Big Bang Theory: 1) A scientific theory explaining the creation of Earth.
2) A really good TV show. Like, when you Google it, the show comes before the theory.
Braces: Bits of metal and wire attached to your teeth to literally pull them to be straight. About as pleasant as they sound.
Breakfast Buffets: Follow the link to the post I did about this – I have a feeling it will come up a lot. https://dandelion199.wordpress.com/2014/06/22/breakfast-buffets/
Brooklyn Nine Nine: One of my favourite TV series about a police department. Hilarious.
Crack of Sparrows Fart: Like the crack of dawn. Very early, my mum says it, you can ignore if you like, god knows I usually do.
Dan and Phil: YouTubers and flatmates. The best.
Doggies: Dogs in my friends lingo.
Dramatic Kangaroo: Like, the best gif ever.
“Driven Nuts”: Something that is so annoying you go bonkers.
Duckies: Ducks in my friend’s lingo.
Education Secretary: Used to be Michael Gove now we have someone who thinks British values should be taught to three year olds. God knows they haven’t been taught to me yet. I think you get the gist.
Existential Crisis: Questioning whether life has meaning. Often caused by A* level maths lessons.
Infinity: Gives me an existential crisis.
Inside Jokes: SO ANNOYING! Unless you are the one in on the joke in which case it makes you feel quite important.
Jane Austen: A woman in the eighteen hundreds who wrote lots of books including ‘Pride and Prejudice’.
MacMillan: A charity raising money to fight cancer and support those who suffer with it. My charity of choice.
Maths: The way we spell ‘math’. When people here say ‘math’ everyone looks at them like they’re crazy and is officially always irritated by them (unless, of course, they aren’t from England).
OFSTED: A team of government-run inspectors who go into schools and say if they’re doing a good job or not. They tend to be hated by most teachers (can’t think why).
Olympics: A sporting event every four years that inspires people into buying Lycra cycling outfits and holding up every car driver in a four mile radius, amongst other sports.
P!ATD: Panic! At The Disco. Another really good band.
Parallel Univers(es): The theory that the thing bigger than a universe is so big that eventually everything that’s happened in our galaxy will have eventually had to repeat itself. Read the post, I’m about as confused as you are.
Philae: The comet that has landed on a comet and discovered what could be organic matter. Rosetta is the mother ship.
Post-It Notes: Sticky notes on which you can write notes to yourself. Used often by organised people (and, surprisingly, myself).
Pythagoras: Some idiot who spent too much time looking at triangles a few thousand years ago.
Sainsburys: A shopping centre with a very vibrant orange colour everywhere. It is not good when you have a headache.
Selfie: Don’t get me started.
Shakespeare: Pretty awesome dude who doesn’t tend to make sense (so lots of people hate him) but who is absolutely hilarious once you get used to the vocabulary.
Spell Check: Something that thinks I am American and insists on me changing things like ‘colour’ to ‘color’. It drives me nuts!
Sun Cream: I believe it is also know as ‘sun screen’. Stops you burning (or at least, tries to).
Tea: I know this seems an obvious one but anyone outside of England doesn’t get exactly what tea is. We use it when we’re sick, when we’re celebrating (and can’t afford champagne – who can?) when we’re tired, when we’re wide awake. Or at least, I do. Oh dear.
TFIOS: The Fault In Our Stars. A beautiful book that makes everyone erupt into sobs, written by John Green. Read it. Do it now.
The Ice-bucket Challenge: Really? Have you been living under a rock?
The Sofa: Our sofa is insane. Read the posts, I haven’t got enough space! (the sofa tag)
Tights: The most uncomfortable item of clothing ever invented.
Vair: What posh people sound like when they say ‘very’.
Vlogs: Video Blogging. I don’t do it but I watch popular YouTubers who do (hence the ‘all about YouTubers page).
Wimbledon: A tennis event and also a place. The tennis event is in Wimbledon, I gather.